GGJ04-48

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Main Page The great Gospel of John Volume 4 GGJ04-48 Chapter


Chapter 48 - Zorel's self-realization.

48,1. I now gesture to Zinka and he goes immediately up to Zorel and says: “Brother, the Lord who is almighty and full of mercy, goodness, love and wisdom, wishes me to heal you by laying on my hands, strong in their vitality. Fear nothing, have trust and become a new man and nothing whatsoever you may need for your true physical and spiritual health will be withheld from you! If you desire it and if you trust me, your true friend and brother, then allow me to lay my hands on you!”

48,2. Zorel says: “Friend, with those true words you can send me to the Tartars and I shall go! Therefore, go ahead and put your hands on me, wherever and however you wish and I will not object!”

48,3. Zinka says: “Now then, - sit on this bench and I will make the power of God flow through you!”

48,4. Zorel says: “Which God? Probably Zeus, Apollo, Mars, Mercury or Vulcan, Pluto or Neptune? I beg you just to keep Pluto out of the game; because I truly do not wish to be penetrated by his hurricane force!”

48,5. Zinka says: “Let those gods be who existed only in the imagination of people who were blind for a long time! There exists only one true God, and this is the one God unknown to you, for whom you gentiles also built a temple, but until now have not recognized. But now the time has come for you also to know this unique true God! Look, you will be immersed in this God’s mercy and strength for your salvation if I lay my hands on you!”

48,6. Zorel says: “Ah, then just lay your hands on me now as you know best!”

48,7. Zinka then lays hands on Zorel in the described manner and Zorel immediately falls into an ecstatic trance.

48,8. After a good quarter of an hour Zorel, otherwise fast asleep, starts to speak with his eyes tightly closed: “O God, o God, what a wretched and evil person I am, and what an honest and proper person I could be if only I wanted to be. Therein lies the curse of sin, lies and arrogance, which are all the true basic sins, as they continue to be reborn and to multiply like the grass on earth and the sand in the sea!

48,9. O God! I have so many sins and blemishes on my soul, that I can not see my skin for all the sins. I am truly surrounded in the most dense smoke and fog because of the onslaught of my sins without number!

48,10. O God, o God, who will ever be able to free me from my sins?! I am a prince among thieves, I am a liar, and if I lie I keep adding to the lie in order to strengthen the old lie by using a new one to try to make the old one true. I am a horrible lying dog! Everything I own, was only obtained by lies, deceit or theft, both furtively and openly!

48,11. Of course, in my great blindness I did not regard any of that as a sin, but I also quite often had the opportunity to be convinced by the truth. But I did not want to be! I always invoked Sparta and Lycurgus the lawgiver and despised the wise and just Roman laws of justice! Oh, I am far too much of a common corrupt scoundrel!

48,12. Now the only comfort I have is that I have not as yet murdered anyone; but it was close! If my maid had not run away before I returned home, she would have become the sad victim of my devilish anger!

48,13. Oh, I am an repugnant monster! I am worse than a bear, worse than a lion, worse than a tiger, worse than a hyena, much worse than a wolf, and much much worse than a wild boar! Since I am also as clever as a fox, this marks me a true devil in disguise!

48,14. Oh, I am very sick in my soul and you, brother Zinka, will only be able to heal me with difficulty if at all!

48,15. I am starting to feel a little brighter and the thick smoke and dense fog around me are dwindling! Look how they are getting thinner, and it appears to me that I can breath more easily However in this greater brightness I can really see my true monstrosity for the first time, full of all manner of leprosy, swellings and disgusting tumours! Oh my image is that of a true monster! Where is the doctor who can cure me?! My poor body is healthy but I would not care about the body, if only my soul were able to be healthy!

48,16. O God, if anyone could see my soul he would be horrified by its excessive deformity! The brighter it becomes around me, the more terrible my soul appears to be! Brother Zinka, is there no way my soul could be given a better appearance?

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