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Chapter 40 - ADAM'S SPEECH ABOUT HIS FALL
40,1. When Adam heard this from Seth, Enos and the exceedingly godly Enoch he rejoiced seeing how far My love surpasses all human love, and he was amazed to see that My love had even descended to the depths of the curse, to the smooth serpent's brood. He was deeply moved and made the following short speech, which was preserved until the Flood. This speech was not recorded, but was passed on from mouth to mouth. And this is what it said:
40,2. "O my children! Open your eyes wide and take in the vast stretches of the earth, which now, as far as you can see, are almost everywhere inhabited by my blessed children. Gaze also down into the deep and over all the dark and vast lowlands and see in the east that very high and always burning mountain! Envisage the entire earth if you can and see me, the first man of this earth, - oh what am I saying, see me as the one intended to be the First who in spirit preceded all created beings, was more radiant than the center of the suns and wanted to be greater than God! And God showed me the might of His holiness and I was condemned and cast into the endless depths of the sea of divine wrath where I was flung furiously through bottomless depths. Yes, eternities upon eternities must have passed, but in the vast boundlessness there was still no spot to be found where in this great nothingness I could have found a resting-place.
40,3. "And while I was falling from one endlessness to the next and kept falling and falling forever, I began to realize the greatness and endlessly and forever continuing might of God, and the futility of my aspiration became clear to me.
40,4. "Yet I thought: 'What good is this realization to me now? I am now too distant from God and He cannot possibly know anything of me any longer. For in this endless nothingness there rules nothing but eternal oblivion of God. I have been falling forever from one sea of wrath to the next where endless floods of fire were beating against my brow and broad tongues of flames singed my intestines burning me more than white-hot iron-plates. Now I have sunk even beneath these streams of wrath. Where is the angry God now, and where am I? - All this is dead, endless night!'
40,5. "And behold, when such thoughts of remorse flowed through me, I suddenly noticed a being similar to me floating towards me from the eternal heights. The being reached me with the speed of lightning, seized me with a powerful hand, looked at me with a tender smile and said: 'Lucifer, you poor fallen spirit, do you not know me?'
40,6. "And I replied: 'How should I recognize you in this empty and dark nothingness? But if you are able to destroy me and render me like that which has never been, is not and will never be, then do it and I shall thank you in advance that you may not have to return without having been thanked from this empty place to your to me unknown heights.'
40,7. "And hear what the being spoke: 'Listen! I do not wish to destroy you, but to save and lead you back on strange ways to where you have proceeded from full of sinful arrogance!'
40,8. "And I said: 'Do whatever you can, but bear in mind the magnitude of God's wrath! For I was great and have come to nothing So bear in mind even if you should be greater than I have been - that God is eternal and infinite and full of flaming wrath!'
40,9. "And the being replied: 'Have you never measured also the love in God? - Behold, great as the floods of wrath may be, His love reaches to the point where the deep streams of wrath are exhausted forever under the endless brink of infinity, where a second infinity begins.'
40,10. "To this I replied: 'Behold, when I still was a prince of all the light I was shown a faint little flame. This I was expected to worship as it was said to be God's eternal Love. I could not believe this considering my own radiance, and I saw myself far superior to the faint little flame. And lo, I was overcome with the pride of my level of light. I became still more ignited and wanted to destroy the little flame completely with my light. However, I was seized by the divine wrath and was flung here into this eternal, dark emptiness, which I have reached only after eternities.'
40,11. "And behold, then I saw the little flame float above the head of the being that again spoke to me: 'Lucifer, do you recognize Me now?' And I replied: 'Yes, Lord, I recognize You. You are God's Love and reach further than the flood of His wrath. Look at me in Your mercy and give me a firm little spot where I can find rest in this eternal emptiness!'
40,12. "And behold, from the bright eye of eternal Love a tear ran down into the dark spaces of eternity and became a great water. And Love breathed over the great waters in the depth, the waters separated and countless drops formed from the waters. Then the little flame above the head of eternal Love suddenly expanded and ignited the little drops to countless great suns which in the warmth of eternal Love emitted earths and they in turn their moons.
40,13. "And lo, from the center of God's tear this earth swam up to me and Love blessed it and breathed on it whereupon the earth flowered like a garden, and it was smooth, beautiful and even, but no living being could be seen there as yet. However, Love gazed at the earth and it teemed with all kinds of life, in the seas and other waters, on the firm land and in the air.
40,14. "Look, all this I saw and am now fully aware of it through the special grace of the Lord. - As the earth was now after the will of God's Love gradually in accordance with eternal order equipped in this way, Love raised Its eyes to the height of God and said:
40,15. You holy powers of the Father, let us make man and give him a living soul so that what has fallen may find a resting-place and become humble before You and Me and the might of Our holiness!'
40,16. "Then it thundered from the fire-filled eternal spaces, and the thunder was the voice of God and Love alone understood this voice and It formed from fine clay - look here - these feet which have carried me already for over nine-hundred years, these hands, in short, as I am standing before you eternal Love has formed me.
40,17. "So I was standing there, but I was still lifeless and there were no stirring, no movement to be seen in me. Then eternal Love bent over this lifeless form and breathed through the nose with the living breath a living soul into the organism. And look, then I became alive, as I am now, the first man on the vast earth. I saw the great creation, but it did not give me pleasure and I became tired of my wonderful existence and could not understand how, when and why and whence I had come, for my living, animated form could not see the creating eternal Love.
40,18. "And behold, eternal Love let the form fall into its first sleep and spoke to me: 'Behold your resting-place! Move into the heart of this living habitation, for I have prepared it for you. In it you will find a well-appointed tablet and upon it the will of God will be engraved with great fiery signs. You shall follow this, surrender your will and instead make the will of God your own.
40,19. "This is the strange way on which I will lead you back. Do not ever look to yourself, but always to the tablet of God. Then you will live with Me forever and from a throne rule over infinity! But woe betides you if you fall again, for then even Love will become a curse to you. I shall give man another spirit, initially out of Me, -- but you will have to leave this resting place again for eternities upon eternities and you will have to remain in the eternal fire of God's wrath and the curse of Love!
40,21. "For with God no being is of importance and He is forever not concerned for billions of spirits like you since He can every moment call forth countless billions of greater spirits than you and again destroy them forever if they do not conform to His eternal glory.
40,22. Therefore, bear in mind what God is and wants and what you are and are meant to become with the free will you have been given that the great glory of God may become manifest within you and also in all those who have come out of you and have fallen within and with you!
40,23. Behold the vast tomb of the earth as well as that of countless stellar worlds! I take away from you the great burden of those who fell with you and place it into the earth and all the stars, and not a single mote shall float around uselessly, but shall hold temporarily a living being like you.'
40,24. "And look, then Love took the spirit and planted it in the sleeping form and the spirit was pleased to be securely within me, delivered from the great burden it had been compelled to carry so long. Now it was being carried within the living abode prepared by eternal Love.
40,25. "As I had in this way become one with the spirit, eternal Love awakened me. I woke up and was standing there as one only man facing the entire immeasurable creation, seeing no one but myself, the grass on the ground of the earth, its bushes and trees and the shining sun in the vast, blue firmament. Then I became frightened, left the spot looking for company, but found not one single being like myself.
40,26. "Tired of my search, I once more sank to the ground and was overcome by a sweet sleep and had the following dream: I saw an exceedingly attractive being in the center of my heart And this being spoke to me:
40,27. "Look at me how beautiful and enticing I am with a form like yours, which I can well behold. Once my form was only a great light sending its rays along the endless spaces and consuming itself in its immense power, but I could never behold a form, being a light myself within which countless forms manifested. The forms in which I saw and felt my endlessness were taken from me, but instead I myself have now been given a form. This form is more beautiful than all my former light and I like myself very much in this form and am greatly pleased with myself. I love myself and am loved by you and I feel a great desire within me and for me and can draw you to me whenever I want it and you have to follow the pull of my desire.”
40,28. "And look, I actually felt within me a great pleasure with myself, and in my sound sleep I saw a radiant hand reaching into the center of my heart seizing my second self. Initially this resisted, but soon succumbed to the powerful fingers of Jehovah's Love. For the radiant hand was the hand of eternal Love.
40,29. "Thereupon the powerful finger of God broke a rib of my second self, reached inside and soon pulled a worm from its intestines and then closed the spot where the powerful finger of the Lord had entered to remove the selfish desire. After that my second self no longer looked quite as enticing as before. Its form was similar to mine and I no longer felt the pull towards it, but both of us were drawn by eternal Love. Then I saw the spirit falling asleep, and during this sleep it dissolved seeping into all my parts and we became completely one.
40,30. "While I was still dreaming this, I was suddenly woken by a gentle voice, which was the voice of the Lord, and it spoke: 'Adam, you son of the earth, wake up and look at your helpmate!' - And I saw Eve before me and was very happy, for I saw my second self which had come forth from me and took delight in me. This delight was the first love I, the first, unborn man felt. I saw for the first time my beloved wife and felt a pure love for her in the purity of God's eternal Love in all the fullness of initial life.
40,31. "And in such a sweet sensation I lived for three days and three nights. But then I suddenly felt certain emptiness within me and did not know what to make of it and what could develop there from.
40,32. "My heart felt like a desert and my mouth was dry, and behold, suddenly eternal Love was standing before me, looking so mild and loving, breathed upon me, strengthened me and spoke: 'Adam, look, you are hungry and thirsty for food and drink and so is your love whose name shall be 'Eve'. See the trees I shall now bless for you; eat their fruit for the invigoration of your body and soul. But of that tree which is standing in the middle of the garden you shall not eat before I return to bless you and the tree. For on the day you will eat from that tree death will enter you. You will be tempted, but be steadfast until the third time and you will destroy the worm of death which is gnawing at that tree, purify Eve and prepare for yourself, for her and all that go forth from you a completely free, blissful, everlasting life in God.
40,33. "Behold, I created time in order that your temptation may not last long, but the attained life forever.
40,34. "You do not have to fight against any strange power, but only against yourself I have subjected everything to you, but I could not, and may not, do it with you if you are to attain to life. Therefore, do not ignore this easy commandment, but rise above yourself that you may live forever!
40,35. Behold, the worm is the evil within you and carries the pricks of death. So do not kick against the pricks of the worm, which I have before Eve removed from your heart while you were asleep forming Eve from it. You love her because she has come forth from your love and her flesh from your desire and thus there remained within her the root of death, which you shall animate through your obedience.
40,36. "Beloved Adam, behold I, God's eternal Love from which all life issues, am telling you this, requesting you: Do not spoil for Me this great work on you! You know what a lengthy Time of times has passed since I caught you in your eternal fall from life to death. If then time had already existed, a billion of such earth years might have passed, and I did not hesitate at making every effort to save you, My dear created brother. Since I have done so much, you may as well do what little is needed to restore to Me My beloved brother so that we may become once more one love in God, our holy Father, forever. Amen.'
40,37. "And behold, thereupon Love left me and I took food and drink to fortify me - for disobedience! O children, listen, I became disobedient to eternal Love!
40,38. "Earth can tell you about the magnitude of my offence, for everything was razed to the ground and infinity was filled with the great power of God's wrath.
40,39. "I hid myself and wept bitter tears of remorse, and eternal Love did not reject my tears and was pleased by the tears of Eve. O children, listen, Love straightened everything out again! - I sinned again on a Sabbath and wept aloud about my depravity. And behold, Love sent an angel and had me led away from the garden of temptation to a land, which Seth still well remembers, a land of betterment, but also a land of sorrow, - but then again to a land of joy. For when I removed the curse from Cain, who had become bad through my prick of death as he had come into being from the juice of the apple poisoned by the worm of death, the Lord's Love gave me my dear Abel-Seth. Now, a hundred years ago, the new angel of the Lord's eternal Love led all of us into this land of the cognition of God and His eternal truth where Abel planted the sword and picked the red and white berries from the bush.
40,40. "Behold, children, God's boundless love and what it has done for me and all of you, what it is still doing and will be doing forever! Therefore, be happy, even when eternal Love punishes also the children of Cain. But let none of us go there without the Lord's express command, for there the soil consists of the dirt of the worms. Therefore, let no one dare go there unless the Lord has blessed him! For now all evil lies in the women of the lowland, so do not defile yourselves with them. Amen."
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