SSUN1-50

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Chapter 50

Untenability of this material apparition of heaven

50,1. Look, we are together, so keep looking; the company who walked away, have come to the border of the big garden. It is surrounded by a transparent wall which is, as you can convince yourselves, apparently a very beautiful decoration for the garden; but because it is transparent, he has the fatal attribute that one can see through it into a terrible abyss. Our guests would dearly want to go further and would be able to climb over the wall without any trouble, but this known, fatal situation curbs such an endeavor. We see our whole company standing at the wall, flustered; none of the guests know what should be done next. You can also see that several table servants are approaching them, while a leader of the servants comes to the timid company, addressing them as follows: Dear friends and brothers, what have you done now? The company answers: Forgive us, dear friends, we have done nothing else but what we felt inside of us to be an urgent need of life. We can assure you from our innermost urge to live, that his heaven, of which nature is too familiar to us, impossibly can be, and therefore we tried to become active.

50,2. The first table servant says: I certainly do understand that the extended sitting and continuous eating, as well as the constant monotonous gazing upon your godly trinity, is becoming boring to you, but if you would think back on your lives, you indeed never have prayed for anything else but for “the eternal rest” and for an “eternally shining light”, and also to the satisfied at “the table of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the heavenly realm” and to get to see God, who “lives in theeternally inaccessible light” face to face. Since you have now received all these literally and faithfully, why are you not satisfied with it?

50,3. The guest who acts as speaker, says: Best friend, I shall answer you on behalf of the whole company; be therefore gracious to listen to us. We have on earth believed everything strongly and certainly which our church has presented to us. We have thought to ourselves: If we would live mindfully and strictly according to the teaching of the church, being active in the faith according to the love that activates this faith, then we cannot go wrong or fail at all, for we would be constantly in possession of the Holy Spirit. Well, we have truly achieved everything which the church has taught us and which we unfailingly have believed.

50,4. But alas, another light has dawned upon us after we have achieved everything we have believed and because of this light, we have come to suspect that there must exist some other kind of heaven somewhere, for the heaven we are in now, is in fact literally and figuratively spoken, nothing but purest imprisonment. What is the eternally well-provided table good for, what for the eternal beholding of the three Godly persons, if no benevolent action is ever taken over the ages? And then, do not blame me, best friend: to sit forever! This thought must bring every timid spirit to desperation at some point!

50,5. We must admit that sitting does not cause any pain as is the case upon earth. It also is in no way unpleasant to be constantly in very amicable and pious company; we also very much liked to see the Godly trinity. The food and drink are so tasty that it does not offend our palates or our stomachs. We even hear lovely, pleasant singing, beautiful to the ear, among the many guests at the table.

50,6. Look, this would all be good and well, but if you would think, best friend, that the terrible eternity would consist of this, then you just have to, if you have only a little bit of living, humane feeling inside of you, hesitate in the depths of your souls. For, as one was wont to say upon earth, it is logical and true that life is a freely moving power. Look, we feel this power inside ourselves, but despite this living feeling, we must sit at the table forever! Is this not directly in opposition to the concept of life?

50,7. Above all, I have to, based on my experiences gained upon earth, add another remark and I believe that you would easily gather from this just how unnatural this heaven is regarding the human feeling. When I was upon earth still a very livid young man of about thirty years, being unmarried, I met a maiden by chance, and being a heavenly beauty to me, I said in my heart: My God and My Lord, if you would give me this girl to be my wife, I would be more content with that than if you would give me immediately, free access to heaven! I have made a vow in my heart that this heavenly angel should become my wife. After this oath, I did everything possible to make her mine. It cost me much effort and exertion, but I thought: the harder I shall have to fight for this earthly angel, the happier I would be the day on which I can have her. Yes, my fantasy got so far that I even imagined that when this female angel would stand before me forever, and I can look at her from head to toes, I would never be able to get enough of her.

50,8. And look, after almost two years of bitter struggle, have this angel truly become my wife. Truly, at first, I could barely believe that I have been the happy one who now had the full right to say to this angel: My beloved wife! I was overjoyed! But look, after about two years I have become so accustomed to this angel that it often cost me much self-denial to stay, at least out of decency and honor, with her at home. At first, I also was so jealous in my heart, that I would be able to be angry at a true angel from heaven if he would dare to come near my heavenly ideal. But after two years, I must admit to you to my shame, I would often be glad if my heavenly ideal would now and then go for a visit, that I would find some time to walk for a bit in the free, Godly nature.

50,9. And look, already then, I thought to myself: My God and Lord, if this is how heaven is going to be, it will certainly not attain to human needs. Yet, I also thought: If heaven would be such eternal monotony, then God shall change the emotions of an immortal spirit to such an extent that this eternal monotony should provide unspeakable bliss. Now I have tasted the true heaven and I tell you, it fares no hair better; to the contrary, it is even considerably worse than my earthly heaven was. If the Master will not remove the fatal feeling of boredom from my body, especially in view ofthe eternal monotony, I would much rather be a wood chopper upon earth. For best friend, I tell you again, the idea that everything one enjoys here would last forever without change is horrible.

50,10. Judge for yourself regarding the despair in me and do with us what you will. I shall not be brought back to the table, even if you put in ever so much effort! I would rather wander about in this garden and when I’m hungry, I can get something to eat from the trees for myself; but as said: I’m not going back to the table!

50,11. I want to add that my memories of my active life upon earth is giving me greater pleasure than this whole heavenly table, with exception of course of the sighting of the Godly trinity. Some things can still be said about that, but this theme is too holy and we are not worthy to express ourselves verbally about it. Therefore, judge only this and act accordingly.


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