SSUN1-55

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Chapter 55

First solid dwelling after the apparent heaven. Incomprehensible tri-unity. The Christ of the Gospel.

55,1. Our speaker says to his company: now this is just too curious! Up till now, I have always believed that spirits could only vanish so instantly for people on earth, but for spirits to become invisible to spirits is something completely new to me. Whoever can tell me how this spirit, which undoubtedly has to be an angel, could vanish from before our eyes so instantly, knows more than me. By my poor life! I believe man would rather be able on earth to take a bite off the moon than to find an answer to this question. Another one answers him: Best friend, I do not find it as strange, for I have often heard upon earth that spirits could travel as fast as lightning. Because this angelic spirit has vanished so quickly from before our eyes, is nothing but a clear confirmation of what we have often heard on earth.

55,2. A third one says: Best friends, this is all good and well regarding our table servant being an angel, but for such an instantaneous flight he certainly had to put his wings in motion. As long as I do not see wings on an angel, I do not believe that it is an angel, for all pious people on earth always would have seen angels with wings, which always was only possible in a condition of so-called spiritual rapture, therefore, always with the spiritual eyes. If pious people always have seen angels with wings, why not us, who are now indeed completely spirit?

55,3. The first speaker says: Best friend, I must honestly tell you that such a desire comes forth from a very weak spiritual attitude. Everyone knows that wings only depict great velocity and is as such only an apparition. Such a spirit can therefore very well be an angel without having a visible pair of wings. The most notable is, as I have already said, that the one spirit can become invisible to the other spirit. It does not even phase me that we, being spirits, cannot proceed as fast as our table servant, for one certainly need some practice for it; one keep learning like that! But as I said, I cannot let go of the vanishing. Enough of it. When we shall meet him again, as he said, he shall explain it to us.

55,4. Let us rather take in this truly wondrously beautiful environment; truly, to me, it certainly is a thousand times more beautiful than our previous exalted heaven. I would like to live here and become a happy farmer over there on the mountains. Just look at the lush grass, the magnificent trees, the beautiful lane with trees, which seems to have the noblest kind of fruit; and then also the little brooks. Look there, in front of us, how this vast, beautiful plain is encompassed with glistening mountain ridges and how these mountains are without exception adorned with wonderfully beautiful palace-like buildings. If my eyes do not deceive me, then I also see on the nearby mountains those white-clad beings wandering about in the palaces. This suits me well! This environment looks much more like a heaven than the one where we had to stay seated as gluttonous polyps.

55,5. Yes, this is exceptionally beautiful. The trinity is indeed nowhere to be seen, but this whole environment is instead illuminated by a brilliant sun. If can be honest, I must admit that I can easily miss out on gazing upon the trinity in the view of this splendor; but instead, another idea just came to me.

55,6. It would be, in addition to all the beauty, the pinnacle of all joy to me if we could meet Christ the Master here somewhere, just like when He lived on earth and taught His disciples. For there is yet another thing which I must honestly admit to you: it is indeed something exalted to gaze upon the Godly trinity, but I would be an infamous liar in the depths of my heart if I would allege that It has given me any measure of a warm feeling of love. I have indeed forced myself to it as much as possible, but I failed to encompass the three personalities in equal measure with my love. For would I like the Father, then I could not like the Son at the same time. When I discovered this in myself, I thought that the Father, as well as the Son, could have taken it badly. Would I only want to like the Son, then I asked myself whether the Father would have been content with it?

55,7. I also must honestly admit that my inner struggle to love the Holy Spirit in the form of a dove, was futile. I could just as well have loved a piece of wood, rather than this third, highly impersonal Godly person. The Holy Spirit goes the least of my loving thoughts because I could never fathom His being and imagine myself anything of Him. Father and Son are closer to my heart; If there would not have been two, but only the one or the other, then I would have been able to like either the one or the other.

55,8. I did, in fact, had secret thoughts that if Christ would for once descend from His high throne and go somewhere where I could find Him alone, I would indeed be able to love Him from the depth of my heart, but with my still much too inadequate love for the inaccessible light, I could not, as said, approach either the Son or the Father in their inaccessible light. I find it completely unnatural to focus love, whether spiritual or physically, on something in infinity, for love desires an attainable object - to love something unattainable, is absolute folly to me.

55,9. When I was still on earth, I once wanted to see if I could fall in love with a beautiful star. I have watched such a star for lengthy periods and have forced my heart as much as I could; but do you think that I could foster true love in me for that star, like for a good friend, or a sympathetic female friend? Oh, I never could do that!

55,10. I fared in the same way not much better than with my love unto the trinity and for the most holy altar sacrament; for as often as I entered communion and had to ask my heart whether my heart is longing more after the sacrament or more after my wife and children, I had to admit to my shame that my love for my wife and children was much stronger than for the holy sacrament. Likewise, could I never really manage to truly include the trinity, just like the holy altar sacrament, in my heart, but I could only approach it with a kind of holy reverence. Yes, I, in fact, have gone so far with my holy reverence, that I regarded the natural love of the heart for God, literally to be a sin.

55,11. Only with Christ, it was different. When I read His gospels, I would always imagine myself to be present and during my poor life, I always thought that if I would have the mercy that was the share of the apostles, truly, I would have become an apostle myself and I would have, without effort, leave wife and children out of pure love for Him! Yes, I have to tell you that I would in fact if I would properly consider, have done everything solely out of love for the Christ of the gospels, to which the few blissful dreams I had about Him, have stirred me up.

55,12. I involuntarily keep struggling in myself with the holy trinity and the holy altar sacrament. Because my heart has always been as cold as north pole ice towards this too mysterious, incomprehensible, Godly exaltedness. Friends, I do not want to force anything upon anybody with this confession; I have only openly exposed my heart in this free environment. You are free to do the same as well, for there is still enough time before we shall reach the indicated palace.

55,13. Many of the company reply to him, saying: Friend and brother, we can honestly assure you that it fared not one hair better with us in this respect. We did obligingly believe everything, but we were often filled with a mysterious, holy awe, which completely dumbed us down, but has then found our rest back in the evangelical Christ. Our hearts therefore often ignited with a greater love for the most blessed mother of God as well as for many other saints, rather than for the most holy, Godly Highness, whom we, in fact, fear, and that unto a measure of doubt. To stir up love for the One we are fearing so terribly would take some doing, though.

55,14. Then there is the question whether we would get to see the blessed virgin Mary or any other saint in this region, for in the heaven we have been, there also was no sign of them. Friend, you who still have the best reasoning, can perhaps tell us something about it.

55,15. The speaker says: dear friends, I think we should not ask too much concerning this issue, but only exert ourselves to reach the indicated palace as soon as possible, to receive there the promised explanation about the word of God which we did not understand, especially those of Paul and John; secondly can we, since we are not able to see the Godly trinity anymore, hold on stronger to our evangelical Christ. According to His proclamation: “In the house of My Father are many dwellings”, does this place look much more like a heaven than the heaven up there, where we saw only one dwelling. Enough of this now, for look, our alleged table servant is already coming to meet us. Let us go to meet him silently and peacefully.


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