CYOU-188

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Main Page The Childhood of Jesus CYOU-188 Chapter


Chapter 188. – Cyrenius affirms his love for the Lord. The test: Tullia's death. Cyrenius' profound grief. The justified rebuke of the disappointed Infant and its effect on Cyrenius.

188,1. As Cyrenius looked at the globe once again with great attention, the Infant requested to be allowed to go to the hill and hop around a little.

188,2. And Cyrenius very gently set Him down on the earth and said:

188,3. "O You my Life, You my Salvation, You my All! I only release you physically from my hands;

188,4. but never, never from my heart; for You alone live there, – yes You alone are my love!

188,5. Truly, as long as I have only You, o My Saviour, then all the treasures of the world are less than nothing!"

188,6. Here the Infant stood up, turned again towards Cyrenius and spoke to him:

188,7. "In that case, I must, after all, stay with you, although I would have really liked to hop around a little, because You love Me so much!

188,8. Look, it would have become a little boring for Me to be with you, if you had constantly looked at your little earth;

188,9. but as your heart and all your attention has again turned fully towards Me, I have to remain with you and cannot leave you!

188,10. But listen, My dear Cyrenius! What would your wife say, if she heard that you love only Me?"

188,11. And Cyrenius said: "Lord, if I have You, what concern should I have about my wife and the whole world! – See, all this can be traded off for a mite!

188,12. O You my Jesus, what bliss can ever be greater than loving You above all else and to be loved by You in return!

188,13. Therefore I would rather despise Tullia as I would a plague of locusts, before I would give up an infinitesimal fraction of the love I have for You!"

188,14. The Infant spoke: "Cyrenius, if I would test you a little on this, do you think that you will remain steadfast?"

188,15. And Cyrenius said: "According to my present feelings, You may cause the earth under my feet to become dust and take Tullia a thousand times, if it were possible, and I would still love You the same!"

188,16. Here Tullia suddenly sank onto the ground as if hit by a blow and was completely dead.

188,17. All those present were extremely frightened. Fermented lemon juice and fresh water was instantly brought to revive her;

188,18. but all efforts were in vain, for Tullia was stone dead.

188,19. When Cyrenius saw that Tullia was really dead, he covered his face and began to get very sad.

188,20. The Infant now asked the sorrowful Cyrenius: "Cyrenius! How am I to understand this? See, the earth is still whole, and your wife has not died a thousand deaths, as you had demanded, – and now you are as sad as if you had lost everything in the world!

188,21. Am I not the same to you now as I was formerly, when I was everything to you?! – Why are you grieving so much now?"

188,22. Here Cyrenius sighed deeply and sorrowfully spoke: "O Lord! As long as I had Tullia, I did not know how dear she was to me; only after losing her have I realized her worth!

188,23. That is why I grieve – and I will grieve for her all my life, as she was such a noble and faithful aide!"

188,24. The Infant sighed heavily and spoke: "O you fickle human beings! How little steadfastness lives within your hearts!

188,25. If you are like this already in My presence, how will you be when I am not among you?!

188,26. Cyrenius! What was I to you a few minutes ago, – and what am I to you now?

188,27. You are covering your face from Me as well as from the world, and your heart is so full of sadness that you can hardly hear My voice!

188,28. I tell you: Truly, you are not worthy of Me!

188,29. He who loves his wife more than Me is not worthy of Me, for I am more than a wife, who has been created through My power!

188,30. I say to you, be more circumspect in the future, otherwise you will never again look upon My face in this world!"

188,31. Hereupon the Infant went to Joseph and said to him: "Joseph! Let the dead woman be brought into the small closet and place her on a bier!"

188,32. Here Joseph asked: "My little Son, will she never live again?"

188,33. And the Infant spoke: "Do not question Me about this; for My time has not yet come, but do as I say!

188,34. See, the woman was jealous of Me, when Cyrenius confessed his love for Me; it was this covetousness and jealousy that killed her so swiftly! Therefore do not ask Me anymore, but place her on a bier in the small room; for she is really dead!"

188,35. Hereupon Joseph had the corpse brought into the house, prepared a bier in a small side room and placed the corpse on it.

188,36. All now went to Cyrenius and consoled him for the sudden loss of his wife.

188,37. However, Cyrenius uncovered his face, straightened up like a true hero and spoke:

188,38. "O dear friends, do not console me in vain; for I have already found my consolation in my own heart,

188,39. and you cannot give me a richer one!

188,40. Look, the Lord gave me this noble wife, and then He took her away from me; for He alone is the Lord of all life!

188,41. Therefore let all be offered up to Him, and let His holy name be honoured and praised eternally!

188,42. It is certainly a hard blow to my human heart; but I now feel it to be all the more invigorating for my spirit!

188,43. For the Lord has thereby released me, and I now belong wholly and free of all earthly attachments to Him alone, and He alone is now the holy resident of my heart! Therefore do not console me; He alone is my consolation in all eternity!"

188,44. Here the Infant came to Cyrenius again and said to him: "Amen! – So be it forever!

188,45. These years on earth, in which we will still be work here, will pass like a breath; however, you will then be where I will be in all eternity among those, who will love Me like you do! – So be it forever, forever, forever!" – – –


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