RBLUM-4

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Main Page From Hell to Heaven RBLUM-4 Chapter

From Hell to Heaven


Chapter 4 - Distress call to God – appeal to Jesus


1. Falling silent for a while after these words, he rubs his eyes to get rid of possible narcotic effect, getting despondent and doubtful of his eyesight ever returning, in spite of all his patience. With no light returning he shouts:

2. “What’s happened to me? What kind of cursed condition is this? Is there no longer a God, mighty and more just with His graces than the Earth’s rulers!

3. “God! - If You exist, then stretch out Your arm! Avenge me, who tried to do the right thing for your children – the way Your teacher of nations Jesus once tried to do. He too was once seized by crude henchmen, being hung on the stake with the greatest humiliation – as thanks for his immense effort and sacrifice for all mankind!

4. “I am, like He, a son of Yours, if You exist! Are You really nowhere other than in people’s consciousness? If however Your power is no greater than what man thinks of his own, then I only speak empty words, and am then betrayed in my entire being forever! Why then did I have to become a living, self-conscious being? Why did some crude idea within infinite space gather itself together within me as a lucid expression of existence? You cursed chance that once got me into this miserable existence! If there be wicked devils, then let them destroy forever such power that brought me into being!

5. “Oh you men, you deceived mankind, stop procreating! You people still living, murder your children and yourselves, that the accursed Earth would be cleared. Oh you rulers, throttle all the people and split up the accursed Earth among yourselves, to abound just for you! But vain is my zeal; an eternal slave! What is one droplet to the mighty, surging sea! Hence, you useless talk, be silent! And you, hands – try and bring an end to this most miserable existence!”

6. Following this, he makes a few deep throttling attempts at his throat, but to no effect of course. For he reaches right through, as it were, each time without feeling the least trace of suffocation. This stays his hand, and this condition gradually confounds him even more. The throttling comes to naught, and he decides to move straight ahead: “Because” he says to himself, with fury, “darker and more bottomless than here it can’t be anywhere within infinite space. Wherefore I need not fear an abyss or some secret execution. Forward therefore! Maybe I will come across some ray of light, or a welcome death!

7. “Oh, what blessing must be a state of complete death! How happy I must have been before I felt an existence, and free consciousness! If only I could suffer complete annihilation again! But let that be as it will; if complete death is a relief, then I need fear nothing further. Wherewith, let’s move ahead!”


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